Monday, November 8, 2010

10 Things I Don't Like About Hawaii

Before you read on, please know I really do like Hawaii - I even wrote another blog post on the things I do like. Everywhere in the world has goods and bads, and these bads aren't all that terrible.

1) Centipedes, Cockroaches, and Cane spiders...

Bugs are bugs, but bugs in Hawaii are more like the monsters that live under your bed - very real and big and scary. Centipedes can be about 10 inches long, purple, with more than enough legs. Cockroaches are slimy and gross, and they can fly! Cane spiders look almost like tarantulas and are very very fast...

2) Christmas...

Don't get me wrong, I love Christmas as much as anyone, but Christmas in Hawaii can be a bit... warm. Read more about how to survive a Hawaiian Christmas here.

3) Snorkelers...

Nothing beats swimming in the crystal clear waters of the Pacific... until an oblivious snorkeler blows water out his spout at you. Lovely.

photo courtesy Jonf728 on Flickr

4) Coconuts...

I never could get to like the taste of this nut - I mean fruit - I mean seed? And it's everywhere because tourists love it. Even Starbucks puts coconut in their Frappuccinos.

photo courtesy Robert Wetzlmayr on Wikimedia Commons

5) Seaweed...

I like seaweed if its in the ocean where it's supposed to be, just not on my plate. Sushi? No thanks. One time, I was offered some popcorn that had some dried green flakes on top. Ignorantly I thought it must have been Italian herbs or something. Wrong, it was seaweed. Unpleasant experience.

photo courtesy Grant Hutchins on Wikimedia Commons

6) Mold...

Mold and mildew are a common sight in Hawaii. Everything is just so moist and humid, and mold loves this. I have many books, and over the years I've had to clean and reclean them to get the mold off. Call me paranoid. One year, the mold was so bad in the house I was living in at the time, I got mold nightmares.

photo courtesy Ciar on Wikimedia Commons

7) Music...

Music is a way of life for me, but Hawaiian music simply tastes a bit wrong to me. Every song sounds the same! I do not lie.

8) 3 a.m. Telemarketer calls...

Being in the middle of the Pacific means being 5 or 6 hours behind East Coast time. Sometimes people tend to forget that you are sleeping most of their morning and call to chat about whatnot. Most times we laugh afterwards... unless that person is a telemarketer.

photo courtesy Can Atacan

9) Sunshine...

There can be too much of a good thing, and honestly I really dislike the sun sometimes. There are days when a frigid wind or snowy afternoon would be much more suited to the mood. But Hawaii is pretty close the  Equator...

10) Commercials...

When you live on a small island, it is torture to watch tv commercials for places that you can't go to: Dairy Queen, Sonic, Kohl's, Target, Narnia...

Are these things you could live with in Hawaii? Leave a comment below and let me know what you think!


  1. We have some of these bad things too, centipedes, tarantulas, small cockroaches, and lets not forget rattlesnakes. Oh and telemarketers are everywhere. But Hawaii is still one of the most beautiful places on earth. JMHO.

  2. Everywhere has a positive side and a negative side.... you're right, Hawaii is gorgeous. This post can be considered a just pointless rant to be redeemed in my next post. Thanks for your visit!

  3. The centipedes and lack of Christmas atmosphere would just kill me. Loove Christmas music, but lately it's been playing when it's 70 degrees out. Not working for me!

    Nice post. :) A splash of reality!

  4. Here in FL, we have the same gargantuan roaches...and spiders (of which I am deathly afraid!). The sun can be relentless...but I love least most of the time. A young friend has been stationed in Hawaii...he has a Target within a decent distance, but he misses DONUTS most of all. He and his wife are being transferred to VA...and one of the first things they plan to do is find a Dunkin' Donuts!
    Thanks for becoming a follower of Artfully Graced. I hope you find my ramblings interesting...
    Jane (AG)

  5. Cute post. I know what you mean about the sunshine, now that we have it almost every single day! Not that I'm tired of it or anything yet, but I was born and raised in SoCal, and any change in the weather for the wetter and cooler is a welcome sight.

    And the bugs. I hear ya. Any place warm is going to have their fair share of unwanted insects and critters. They are all over the world. The biggest roach I ever encountered was in a 4 star hotel in Jerusalem. And it isn't exactly a pretty place!!

    I never thought of snorkelers being, well, annoying.

    I remember Christmas growing up in Hawaii for a few years. Not too bad going to the beach for Christmas day, if you are a water person. You have to be a mountain/terra firma person, right??

    And I'm totally with you on the Hawaiian music. Every song does indeed sound the same. But, so does rap, and pop, and country, and Rascal Flatts, etc. ;-)

    M. Efflandt

  6. @Rachel Totally agree about the Christmas music! It just doesn't feel right!

    @Jane Hilarious about the donuts! Whenever I get back to mainland, I love eating all the food I can't get on my island (like Dairy Queen!).

    @M Efflandt, haha, snorkelers are annoying, but the people inside of them are not. Once you put that mask over your eyes and that snorkel in your mouth, you cease to be human. :) Just joking, of course.
    I actually love the water more than the mountains and love living near the ocean. It's just a different ocean than the one I grew up with. This one is rather more cheerful than I'm used to.

  7. Dumb post. Sorry. Sounds like you were bored. I must be biased because I absolutely love what the islands here have to offer. Maybe you shouldn't be living in HI since most of these things are a way of life here! I'm surprised you didn't put spam of all things...

  8. @Anonymous, oh yes, I forgot about spam! If you read my blog a little more, you will find, among other things, a list of the top 10 things I do like about Hawaii. It's good to be balanced.

  9. Rose, if you don't like Hawaii, do us all a favor and go back to the mainland where you belong. You're a stupid haole pretending to be a local. And what's with the name of your blog? "Pointless Paradise"? If this island is so pointless get out. If the islands are simply a vacation spot for you, get out. It's haoles like you, rich enough to afford the islands' luxuries that make it impossible for locals and Native Hawaiians to afford living in their native homes. What's most disappointing is the fact that you don't even appreciate what the island has to offer.

    Centipedes and cane spiders?
    Get over it. Hawaii is home to nearly 19,000 indigenous species you will find no where else in the world.

    If you prefer negative 20 degree weather, go back home. Hawaii is 70 degrees year round. Millions of people would kill for the opportunity to live somewhere this warm.

    You obviously don't know where the good beaches are. I've lived in Hawaii my entire life, the experience you describe has never happened to me.

    Seriously? Another thing that is completely avoidable. Another pointless item to add to your ignorant list.

    Whiteness is a lack of culture. I'm sorry Hawaii is a melting pot of a variety of Asian cultures and Hawaiian. I'm sorry we have unique dishes offered nowhere else in the world but here. I'm actually not sorry. Go home.

    Again, I've lived in Hawaii my entire life. I've never heard of anyone having a mold problem. I have never had a mold problem. You probably have a mold problem because you're white, and white people don't know how to clean for shit.

    White people write country songs about inbreeding. Hawaiians write passionate songs about everything from love to nature. I'm sorry, I forgot that white people don't know what culture is.

    Telemarketer Calls?
    You have to be incredibly stupid to not know how to fix this one yourself. Holy crap, your list is pathetic.

    Know where it doesn't shine? My ass.

    If you're so homesick, go home. Trust me, know one wants you here.

    1. Dude (or Dudette), chill! Find yur Aloha!

    2. Wow dude. Your ignorance amazes me. White people have no culture? Ha-ha-ha-ha! I assume you dress in "western clothes" and use everything else that whites invented...from car/bike to that window that you close, to the electricity you use and everything else. Or perhaps you dress in grass-skirts and spear-hunt those cane spiders and cockroaches in order to avoid what whites invented? I sense an inferiority complex

    3. Although I grew up in Waianae, I am a Haole and agree with many of your points:
      Never known a snorkel problem, like sushi very much, like coconut and Hawaiian Music,
      Don't like spiders, roaches or centipedes but prefer them to rattlesnakes on the mainland, I do like snow at Christmas, but prefer peace on earth good will to men with a spirit of Aloha. Unfortunately lava hard racism comes through more than anything else in your post.

    4. Haole? LOL Hawaii is such a beautiful place to breed such ugly racism. & I chuckle that this individual brings up money & that you must be rich. I have encountered the same ignorance here on the islands, but luckily, it's from only a few. I guess you have jealousy and "haters" in every culture. I almost feel sorry for someone living with that much ignorance and hatred in their hearts... Inferiority complex indeed. You certainly hit the nail on the head with that one. Hawaii is part of the United States (last time I checked), which means any haole born on the mainland has just as much right here as anyone else. & if some or even most of those haoles have more education or money than you... than go better yourself (just like that haole did!) Chances are, they worked hard for what they have & aren't sitting around hating you for the color of your skin... Love your site.

  10. I just battled a cane spider in my kitchen tonight. My eight year old couldn't stop screaming & crying. I was stung by a 7 inch centipede last year & am so tired of the constant battle with the mildew! BUT... I will still cherish the time I have here in "paradise" with my girls. We've been here for two years & will probably return to the mainland soon. I know I will never regret this time & part of me wishes we could stay forever : )

  11. Dairy Queen missing? Surely you jest -- they were on Oahu even in the 1950's and have maintained a continuous presence until the present.

    Target arrived in 2008 or slightly before, I think. Are you living on Lanai and that's why you don't have access to a brick and mortar Target?

    I have to agree with you about the bugs and the mold, although roaches are beetles and are not slimy.


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